Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Twilight - Breaking Dawn Part 1 - Review


Who's in it? 

Seriously?!

What's it about? 

Breaking Dawn is the fourth (third and a halfed?) movie in the series and sees Bella and Edward marry, the subsequent consummation and accidental, immediate pregnancy (it happens, kids). This (super fast)(which is handy) pregnancy threatens the pact between the wolves and the vamps and both Edward and Jacob must work together to protect Bella.



Any Good? 

In a word, no. In two words, complete tosh. More words? I have to admit I enjoyed the first two movies, swept up in the guilty pleasure that was Team Jacward, the third film wasn't too bad either, though the constant switching of directors became obvious as the story became disjointed.

To me this outing should never have been made into two films. The drawn out wedding and honeymoon high jinks, while titillating to teens, was monosyllabic and bordering on boring. Understandably critics have argued that the book couldn't be shortened enough to fit it all in, in that case the final instalment better be epic because it looks like we got about 3 fleshed out chapters here.

One of the many, many honeymoon scenes (smiley Edward, like smiley Angel, is just wrong)
The acting in Twilight has never been a highpoint and, God help me, I just don't get Kristin Stewart in this role. Constant eye rolling and a perpetual look of breathy nauseousness does not an actress make. Having seen clips of the Twilight spoof Vampires Suck last week its quite astounding that producers didn't pick Jenn Proske for the part, she's perfect!


Bottle feeds isseh?! source

As we limp like a wounded CGI wolf towards the finale I'm hoping this film was just a glitch and the last instalment will be back to its cheesy (in a good way) self. Either way Twi-Hards will be happy as, no doubt, they were with this one. Just not for me, folks. 

By the by, youngest loved it, eldest wanted to leave after 10 minutes. Can't please 'em all. 

Rating:

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