Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Diary of a Spray Tan Virgin

I go through phases with false tan, months of using my beloved Xen-Tan gradual facial tanner, or a Garnier gradual tan or even a quick whizz with Sally Hansen all over for an impromtu night out but then I can spend the following 6 weeks with no tan at all. Pale and interesting. The one thing I hadn't tried though was a spray tan.

Having read Mags' account of her bronze goddess experience, I knew I had to give it a shot. Herein lies my experience: 

  • Repeat body buffing. Call Mags for a bit of encouragement. 
  • While stuck behind a crash on the M50 on the way to my appointment, realise my pits are still fuzzy. Panic. 
  • Pull up to a garage in Blackrock, bloster to the counter and exclaim 'I need razors, red bull and cash back, quick as you can!'. Don't think twice about the poor attendant as I bloster off again. 
  • Arrive at Carter Beauty over 20 minutes late, I apologise profusely when met by Claire, a calming, friendly face who offers me a seat and a drink. I must look awful. 
  • On Claire's instruction, I strip to knicks & face the wall. Make the fatal error of glimpsing myself in the full length mirror on the opposite wall. Die a little. 
  • Quick chat to Claire as she explains the colour choices (Light, Medium, Dark)(opt for medium) and the Iron Man poses I'll be pulling to be tanned. 
  • Tan is a cool mist, not cold at all. Claire doesn't blink once, is professional, friendly and courteous at all times. That really helps. 
  • After drying off with the little blow pipe, I pay the lady and dash back to the car avoiding the downpour. 
  • I spend all evening avoiding rain and water like a nervous Gizmo. 
  • I wash my hair with rubber gloves and endure wet willies from the eldest because he's been asked to put in my Avon Argan Oil hair treatment. Won't be doing that again.
  • I go to my leaba in long sleeved & long legged pjs as recommended. 
  • Get up at 7.30am because of torturous Sleep in Rollers. I'm black. Literally. 

7.30 am pre wash tootsies. 
  • I get washed in warm soapy water as recommended on my Tips sheet from the Salon. 
  • All of the colour seems to be washing off. 
Post wash tootsies really aren't much better. Change shoe choice for the evening so. 
There's definitely colour there but its a little patchy
  • Meet with the Sis for our day out, her first comment is that I smell like biscuits, which is better than the youngest telling me I smelled like the Wezz night club the night before. Sigh. 
  • Get a DM from the lovely Marissa Carter to see how my tan is, now that's great customer service. Explain that it's ok but my feet are bad so she offers to send a pair of scrubby gloves to help. No need for that but it was a lovely gesture. 
  • Wake in the Gibson and scrub myself in the (best) shower (ever) with my muji cloth for a little exfoliation and follow up with moisturiser all over. 
  • There's definitely a hint of tan on my face and chest, just not as bronzed as I expected to be for a full spray tan. 
  • I get home after a days shopping to realise my new Zara jumper has been ruined by tanned sweat pits, despite using deodorant. Boo Urns :(
  • Decide that the spray tan way of life just isn't the one for me. 
My poor geansaí oráiste 


Well today is Wednesday and my tan has worn off naturally, I have been moisturising regularly and exfoliating every second day. I can't say a bad word against the salon as their service was efficient & courteous and their follow up was really appreciated. The spray tan itself only cost me €15 but for the palava I put myself through (and an unwitting garage attendant through) I don't think it's something I'll be doing again. It'll be home jobs for me from now on, sure it's only ever my forearms, décolletage and kisser that people are subjected to anyway. 

Have you had a spray tan before? I'd love to know how you got on...


Tinks_1983 said...

I am terrified of fake tans. The only time I ever look bronzed is getting a bit of colour from sitting in the garden (so not happening this year).

Unknown said...

Thanks for the shout out ;)

I think my spray tan turned out darker... But I might be paler than you.i don't really use tan at home except a gradual tan but I am hooked I'll be getting it done for a wedding in August

Nurse Fancy Pants said...

Errrr..I have my first spray tan ever booked for tomorrow pre hen on sat. I have the fear!!

Sue Jordan said...

Ah no, Cee Cee, don't be afraid, sure Mags loved hers. And mine wasn't disastrous just not what I'd expected is all. It could all be amended. Have a great Hen! x

Sue Jordan said...

No probs for the shout out, Mags, loved your post so much. I'm blaming my skin, it's blemt. Sure no harm no foul, thousands of ladies get them done every day, just didn't work out for me. Are you going to go darker do you think?

Lovely Girlie Bits said...

Ah it sucks it didn't work out for you flossy and am devo you lost your new jumper to some bronzey pit stains.... I trollolled at you "harassing garage attendents" label for this heheh

Sue Jordan said...

I'm usually ok Tinks, I just think my skin didn't react well to this one is all. With you on the no real sun this year though I live in hope.... x

SmileLucySmile said...

My friend gets her spray tan done in Bray somewhere for 10-15 euro. But she also tans at home with gradual tan moisturiser. But her tan is always flawless.
Maybe youd be willing to do it again someday :)

Sara said...

The most I will dive into the world of fake tanning is gradual tanning moisturisers, Im scared it would come out horribly and that picture of Ross made me giggle, what a funny episode:)

boredmum said...

Ok, just a quick Ceist for ya, emmmmmmmm, why didn't she spray your toes????

I had two spray tans done one, for my hen and the next for my wedding, have to say it turned out perfect both times, my hands were a little dodge the first time, but that was just because i hadn't prepped them properly before hand (pun intended)with loads and loads of moisturiser, however for the main event i did and it turned out brilliant, I wouldn't dismiss future spraytans Sue, it just depends on the type of tan they use, sure ya know yourself, lol

Scarie said...

I got a spray tan for my friend's wedding. It was so bad! I have a lot of lines on my neck ( cos Im a bigger girl) and the tan settled in the lines. I got less sprayed on my face but my sister didnt and can send ya the "youve been tangoed" photo! Hated it! My ex ( should have known he was an idiot for this among there things) kept telling me I smelled awful on the day!

Anonymous said...

I've had one done once and I turned out fairly orange even though I only went for the 'medium' option. It also cracked on my shins quite a bit so I looked like a giraffe! (with moisturing and pre-exfoliation). Certainly won't be doing it again. Plus, standing naked except for a paper g string and pulling strange poses in front of a stranger isn't cool.


Sue Jordan said...

You win some you lose some, right? Poor chap :)

Sue Jordan said...

It could happen Lucy, I think the fact it was my first is something to do with it alright :)

Sue Jordan said...

Seriously love that episode, my eldest lad has just taken to watching friends - I honestly forgot how funny some of them are :)

Sue Jordan said...

She did spray 'em, that was my fault as I put on ballet pumps afterward to drive home, I guess the inside of those is nicely bronzed :) Delighted you enjoy them though, sure some people get them done every fortnight, lucky tanned suckers!

Sue Jordan said...

What a douche, K! That's a real shame it ruined your photos :(

Sue Jordan said...

Hi Elenorjane, haven't seen you for a little while. Laughing here at your comment, especially the giraffe reference :D

boredmum said...

LOL........ ya spanner

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